Category Archives: Health

A blog about things I have done to make strives to improve my health.

Randomness Extraordinaire

Borrowed from Skinny Emmie

Borrowed from Skinny Emmie

I’ve been thinking about something.  A lot.  The name of this blog is “Finding Christi” but after 2 years of being on this epic quest, something has become clear; I don’t need to be found.  I’ve never been lost.  I’ve been here the whole time.  At times I may have lost my way or been confused about the direction my life was turning.  I have at times lost my voice.  But I’ve always been here.

So what is it that I have been thinking about?  I feel like the name of this blog should be a more appropriate representation of me.  I am considering renaming this blog “Being Christi”.  Kind of just wanted to throw that out there and maybe get some feed back on what my loyal reader thinks.

The next bit of randomness involves me hooking.

No, no.  Not THAT kind of hooking.

Crocheting.

If you know me in real life, you know I am obsessed. I always have been.  A couple of my aunts taught me some basic stuff when I was a kid to keep me entertained.  As I get older the more I find myself wanting to do it more.   I have more crochet hooks and yarn than I need.

It really is a terrible affliction.  Your house becomes covered in various crocheted items.  And your friends and family and their kids and friends can only stand to be given so many crocheted things.

So this leaves me in quite the predicament.  What do I do with the pieces I make?

My husband has suggested I sell it.  But I don’t know.  In a way I see his point, at the very least it would cover the cost of the yarn and I would be able to buy more yarn!  On the other hand, who would I sell it to?  Am I good enough to ask someone to give me money?

The one thing I know for sure is I want to make some various pieces, book marks, wash clothes, dish clothes, scarfs, hats, lapgahns etc., to give out at some assisted living homes around here.  I would like to have a few boxes full come December.  I just have to figure out how to fund this project and how to go about actually being allowed in to give these things to the residents.  Any ideas or suggestions would be appreciated.

Here are a few examples of my work:

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babyheadphones

cowgirl set

On health note.

My food this week has been less than stellar.  It hasn’t been horrible, but could certainly use some improvement.  Something about cold weather makes me crave ice cream.  I don’t know why this is.  I probably have my Daddy to thank for that.  He always had ice cream and it seems like especially in the winter.

I’m getting ready to take the family Paleo.  This should be fun, and I am sure we will all be going through some sugar and carb withdrawals.  Please keep us in your prayers during this time.

Does anyone have a beginners Yoga dvd you would recomend?

‘Til next time!

~C

 

 

 

 

 

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Filed under crochet, Diet, Fun, General, Health, Uncategorized

Being Called Out

It’s no secret that I’ve been struggling.  I’ve been struggling for the better part of a year now. 

It is also no secret that when I struggle, I hide.  I’ve really neglected my blog and my social media friends.  Both of which I love and need.  Desperately.

Although my darkness recently has not been anywhere near as dark as it has been in the past, imagine my surprise when I was reading a blog the other day and minus my name, nailed me to a t.

That’s right, Tara over at A Life Changing Journey was telling of a recent experience she had at Walmart.  Go ahead and go over and read it, it’s fairly short and the story is pertinent to mine…I’ll be here waiting.

What Tara describes in her blog about that woman and her child could have very well been me and any one of, if not all, of my 4 kids.  It horrifies and terrifies me to think that I am this woman.  While we do better most days, the reality is my children have no idea what whole foods are, they prefer sodas (diet or regular) over good ol’ water. 

When I first read the blog, admittedly, it ruffled my feathers.  But as I laid in bed waiting, begging, needing sleep to over take me, my mind kept spinning back to what Tara had written. 

Tara is 100% correct.  I am addicted to junk foods and drinks.  I do look for the easy way out when feeding myself and my family.  What is most disturbing though is even though for the past year I have lamented about wanting changing, teaching my kids better, blah, blah, blah.  I have failed.  I have not made much of an effort to live my life differently.  In turn my children are doing exactly what I am doing.  I actually call it “Monkey see, monkey do syndrome”.

I mean, a 5-year-old should really be able to shop with Mom for an hour without having leg cramps that keep her up all night later.  Right?  Right!

Then last night as I laid in bed, waiting for sleep, I realized that I have insomnia most nights because I don’t do enough physical activities most days to tire my body and mind.  I know this because when I actually get off my ass and work out, at night when I go to bed I fall right to sleep and my insomniac episodes are far and few between.

So, last night as I was trying to go to sleep I was reading blogs.  I came across a blog Emily at Skinny Emmie wrote about doing whatever it takes to reach your goals.  What really struck me though was this:

Borrowed from Skinny Emmie

 
For the past year I have been focused on finding myself, when all I really need to do is create myself.  Funny how something so simple can have such an emotional impact.  When I saw those words in black & white, I cried. 
 
Everything these two amazing bloggers/women wrote in these two recent blogs has really broken my heart and moved me.  Had they scribbled my name in there some where, I don’t believe they could have spoken to me any more clearly.
 
So thank you ladies for the slap in the face.  I really, really need it and it was long over due.

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Filed under Diet, Health

Neglected Blog

Ok, I’ll admit it.  I neglect my blog.  There is a laundry list of reasons why. 

I’m embarrassed to continue blogging about trying to lose weight when I am not making any real progress.  Or my blog simply isn’t a priority right now. 

I don’t feel either are valid reasons to run  and hide, but we all know that I hide. 

I haven’t weighted for a couple of weeks now.  I haven’t been watching my blood sugar or eating right. 

I’ve got to find that “something” to get me going again.

I know, no one can make me do it.  It has to come from within.

I’ve been thinking about something lately.

Do I love myself?  Hell, do I even like myself? 

Honestly, most days are no.  I go between acceptance and complete and utter loathing.

This is where my hang ups stem from and why I continue to fail.  Not just with weight loss, but also with every other change or improvement to my life I try.

When I tell myself and others that I want to change, I am essentially saying  “I love myself, I find value in myself, I am worth fighting for”.

While I want the change, I have a hard time loving myself or finding value or fighting for myself.  Hence, I find it next to impossible to stick with any sort of plan or change. 

I constantly fall back into old habits.  They are familiar, they are comfortable.

So this is where I am these days.  I pray that I don’t stay here long.  We are finished with our little hiatus from church, I know getting back into the routine will help.

I also know that if I will lean on the Lord, he will guide me.

It’s time to start turning it around.

 

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Wake Up Call

Over the past few days, I’ve really had to do some pretty tough soul-searching.

This coming Saturday, October 1, will mark my 1 year Blogiversary.

Not much has changed.  I was hoping and praying that by this time there would be significant change in me physically, emotional and mentally.

So what has happened?  Lack of commitment.  Plain and simple.  For me it has been hard to stay committed to a diet change and exercise routine when I am met by resistance from my husband and kids.  They have not been thrilled by the changes I have tried to implement.  Inevitably after a few days of arguing, I usually cave and just give in to what they want.

But maybe, just maybe, my husband has had a wake up call.

Not only do I have diabetes, we have recently discovered that he does as well.

This just further solidifies to me, and now him, that we are not living in a healthy way.  We are not teaching our children healthy habits.

We are planning to sit down later tonight or tomorrow and have a good hard look at our lives.  Every detail.

I will be sure to let you guys know what we come up to.

Chris is at least realizing now that he has no choice but to change his diet and start exercising.

 

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The Mysterious Case Of The Missing Blogger

You may have noticed that I have been absent, missing, on the down low, the dl, incognito.

Maybe, it isn’t really all that mysterious.  After all, I have lost my marbles in the past and flew the coop with little to no warning.

It is likely that this is what you presumed (notice I did not say you assumed, therefore I didn’t accuse you of making and ass out of you or me) was going on.

As I alluded to in my previous post, I have been using my “free” time to read, study, reasearch, learn.

For a while now, I have been telling Chris that in order for any diet to really work for me I have to get off the processed foods.  Plain and simple.  They are bad for you and addictive (at least to someone like me, who already has an addictive personality).  I have also expressed to him the desire to get the kids off of processed foods and sugar for more than a little while. 

I don’t want them growing up with the same food issues I have dealt with for a lifetime.  I want to teach them to make healthy and wise food choices.  But you really have to lead by example where that is concerned.  It does no good to preach to your kids about the perils of super refined and sugar laden foods while having a candy bar in one hand and a coke in the other.

After doing some internet research on the Paleo diet, I decided I wanted more information.  I know I could have gotten most if not all the information I needed right off the internet, but I like the idea of holding a book in my hands, turning the pages one at a time, even dog earing the pages as I come to a point I must stop reading.

So, off to the books store I went. 

I purchased The Paleo Solution: The original Human Diet by Robb Wolf.

I freaking loved it!

It was funny, smart, insightful and revetting.  I remembered enough of my EMS classes that at least the parts of the book that had information that I’ve previously been exposed too was correct. 

You may be wondering what The Paleo Diet is exactly

My interpretation is this:  Low carb minus all processed foods and dairy.

Will it be hard?  Yes!  I love my cheese and sour cream.

Will it be worth it?  Yes, I believe not only will I start feeling better, I will also start looking better.

This next week will be spent making the transition to a processed foods and dairy free lifestyle.  I am also going to be making the switch to grass-fed beef, and butters made from grass-fed beef.   I will begin trying to incorporate more wild fish and eggs enriched with omega-3.  All of this along with a rainbow of fresh vegetables (limited fruits due to my blood sugar issues).

I’ll be sure to keep you updated on my progress.

 

 

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Filed under Diet, Health, Weight

Where Ya Been Christi?

Some of you may (or maybe not) be wondering where I have been.  The simple answer is reading.

I have a limited amount of time during the day that is “free”.  Most of the time I elect to spend this time blogging or lurking on various social media sites.

Over the past few days I have done very little of both.

I found a couple of books that I am currently in the middle of reading.  Both are about Paleo diets. 

While I can’t say I am 100% sold, I am very intrigued.  Not only can I see how applying these ideas to a diet, and life in general, would be beneficial.

I still have more reading/research to do. 

I am very excited about it actually.  I can’t wait to finish up the reading and start really implementing some changes into my diet/life.

I’ll be sure to keep you updated as to how these changes work. 

 

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Day 24

When you are unhealthy, or more importantly unhappy with your body/lifestyle it is so easy to get down on yourself.

While I won’t go as far as to say I’ve gotten the eating portion of this down, I am understanding what I can and can’t have.  I am grasping what foods affect my blood sugar and why.  I am making better choices.

But, man 0′ man do I suck it up, big time, at exercising.  For the longest I would tell myself “When I lose 30 pounds, I will start exercising”.  Then the weight never came off.  Now I am at the point of “Well, the weight didn’t come off, so I guess I’m going to have to exercise fat”.

Now I know a healthy diet and a reasonable exercise plan are the keys to weight loss.  Of course I know this. 

But sometimes I feel too fat to exercise. 

It hurts.  My lungs burn.  My joints ache.  My fat jiggles.  My boobs bounce.

Of course I know that I should go at my own pace and listen to my body, but constantly strive to move forward with exercise. 

I just get so discouraged.

I am embarrassed that someone might see me exercise. 

I mean, really?  Embarrassed that someone might see me exercise?  Why would anyone make fun of or criticize someone who is trying to improve themselves?  Yes, I know that it happens.  But why would I care if someone did criticize or make fun of me?  Who are they to me?

Funny thing is, I am most embarrassed about exercising in front of people I know, i.e. family, friends.  And I know they are the least likely people to criticize or poke fun. 

So these are just some of the mental issues I have been trying to work out. 

That and I read a blog the other day about a woman who had lost a significant amount of weight.  During her weight loss journey not only did her body change, but she changed. 

How could she not change?  She was becoming healthy and taking care of herself for presumably the first time in her life.

What scares me about this is the change in relationships that also occur. 

What if I really do succeed and lose weight, thus making my physical and mental selves better?  How is this going to affect my marriage?  My relationship with my kids?  My mom?  Sisters?  Friends?

What if I lose 190 lbs only to wake up one morning to find out I’m not the person I was when I got married and my husband isn’t in love with me anymore?  What if I wake up and I’m not in love with him anymore?

So yea, crap like this scares me.  Being stagnant, non-evolving, fat, unhealthy (physically and mentally) any longer scares me more though.

I realize these are risk I must take.  I have to take. 

Doesn’t make them any less scary. 

Eating has been 100% on track.  I haven’t varied one little bit.

My efforts at exercising are going to have to improve.  Period. 

The 5k I am eyeing happens in exactly 100 days.  No time like today to really work on my 5k in 100 days program!  I can’t think of a better way to “graduate” from the program.  Can you?

 

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