It’s About To Get Ugly

Sometimes you have to step back from a situation, take in the full picture and then you can accurately evaluate where you stand.

That is pretty much where i am at.  I spent the weekend not worrying about my weight, food or exercise.  Instead, I tried to focus on what my goals are health/diet wise.

  • Lose 184 or so pounds
  • Stop smoking
  • No caffeine
  • No sugar
  • No highly processed foods
  • No sodas

To come up with these goals I had to take a real look at where I am starting from.  Let’s face it, my being over weight and thusly not very active can all be attributed to a few addictions.  Yes, I said addictions.

I realize that I am addicted to:

  • Diet Coke (aspartame)
  • Cigarettes (nicotine)
  • Processed foods
  • Sugar

No, they aren’t just cravings.  Cravings can be satiated by a small indulgence and then you move on.  Addictions to food works pretty much the same as other addictions.  If you don’t get a certain thing you pretty much feel as if you will shrivel up, then explode and die.  With the exceptions of a few drugs and alcohol withdrawals, I am fairly certain no one has actually exploded and died while purging things from their bodies/life.

In order to get to where I want to b e I have to rid my body and life of these things.  Starting tomorrow I am going to detox for 10 full days.  I will be drinking at least 1 gallon of water per day to help flush the toxins from my body.  Additionally, I will not be eating any processed foods or sugars.  I am also going to give up cigarettes.

I’ve heard, it is best to tackle one thing at a time.  I also know that my best bet for success  is being alone as much as possible while fighting off cravings.  I am going to take the next 10 days and be completely miserable, but get it all out of my system.  Rather than a week her and there over the next year. 

Will it be hard?  Yes.  Will I be bitchy?  Yes.  Am I prepared?  Yes.

I went shopping and only brought foods that are lean and healthy into the house.  I have given all of my “extra” money to Chris to ensure that I won’t cave during a weak moment.  I have bought 10 days worth of food and water.  I have NOT bought cigarettes and have nicotine lozenges on hand in case of an emergency (i.e.I am on the verge of causing  bodily harm or death for my husband and/or children). 

I am ready to end this.  I am tired of it being all that consumes me.  I have spent the past 30+ years over weight and addicted to one thing or another.  I want to worry about living, having fun and enjoying life.

I want to view food as fuel for my body, only.

I no longer want to live to eat.

Next up:  Exercise revamp!

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3 Comments

Filed under General, Health

3 responses to “It’s About To Get Ugly

  1. Tawnya

    I am praying for you hun. You have a big mountain in front of you, but with God you can conquer it all. Just remember when you feel like hurting someone just pray. I promise it will make all the difference in the world. “You can do all things through Christ who strengthens you” Say it over and over. I love you girl!!!!

  2. Carol

    Dale says he gave up smoking, drinking, and women one night. It was the worst fifteen minutes of his life. hee hee!

  3. Melissa Khammash

    GOOD LUCK! You know I am here for you praying for your success!
    Loved chatting with you yesterday! Keep it up! YOU CAN DO IT!!!!!!!!!!

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